Right on Top of That Rose
"Mama Celeste face up, I go to work, Mama Celeste face down, we're selling carnations on a freeway off ramp.”
Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead (1991)
For full disclosure, this is one of my favorite 90s movies of all time. It resonated with me back then in 1992 as a pre-teen when we rented it, it appealed to me again when I inherited more siblings becoming the oldest and only girl of five children, it hit home when I studied fashion design as a teenager, and it really became relevant to me when I was hired as a marketing assistant to the Senior VP of Marketing for Surveying and Geomatics (seriously I didn’t know what that was when I applied). The longevity of this film to me comes from it echoing several phases of my life so that when I went back to rewatch it (as I often do every couple of years) I saw it through a different perspective of understanding each time.
Christina Applegate (mid-success from Married With Children) is nothing less than brilliant in this film. She conveys an innocence and a naivete while having to play an adult in adult situations. It reminds me of “body-switch” films like the Parent Trap but more realistic. By realistic I mean there is a hidden demographic of kids who had to play parent before they were old enough to vote; sometimes to other actual parents. That precociousness is a heavy and irreversible matter. In the case of the film, Sue Ellen as portrayed by Christina Applegate gets a glimpse into the working career world, and the burnout, stress, uncertainty, and responsibility is something she learns about and learns from. Being a girl in a woman’s shoes, her growth journey is the ultimate “fake it til you make it” fable.
The Review
Sue Ellen Crandell and her four younger siblings are left alone for two months while their mom goes on sabbatical. Unbeknownst to them, their mom has hired a babysitter to look after them, ruining Sue Ellen’s summer plans - in more ways than one. The moment their mom is out of sight, the elderly widowed babysitter Mrs. Sturak turns into the Mary Poppins from Hell, and then suddenly drops dead leaving the Crandell kids to fend for themselves. Not knowing what to do, they dispose of her at a local mortuary along with all of the allowance money their mom had left for them - a blunder they learn about after the fact.
The decision lies between Sue Ellen and her younger brother Kenney, as the two oldest children, which of them will get a job to support them all throughout the summer. When the responsibility falls on Sue Ellen she gets the nearest god-awful fast food job she can find. After one day she finds out how awful fast food work can be, she quits to find a full time office job at a fashion company in downtown Los Angeles. Her plot thickens when she comes across the hiring manager who would rather accept Sue Ellen from outside the company for her executive administrative assistant than promote the receptionist who has a knife for everyone’s back.
Things seem to be going well enough until she has to find a way to replace the petty cash she had been using to feed her siblings and pay the bills. Her love life is taking off with her former fast food co-worker, her boss is supportive, she is learning the ropes and delegating, and also learning the ins and outs of corporate life for all of its ups and downs. When the company gets word that sales are in a slump, overhead is up and profits are down, she comes up with a plan to save the company’s future, provide for her family, and keep her co-workers from finding out that she is only 17 years old. She and her siblings rally together to produce the fashion show that will save her company before the office creep of a backstabbing receptionist blows her cover.
The Take
I mean seriously, who is thinking about their career at 17? Except I was. Like her, by 17 I was spending the summer before my senior year looking after my brothers while my parents figured out how to raise and feed five kids and planning my entrance into the fashion design world. I had a fashion design portfolio from two years of sewing and fashion design classes, albeit poorly drawn but full of good marketing ideas. It started off as a way to make clothes I felt comfortable in for cheap, because no one gets new designer clothes in a lower middle class family with five kids. I was planning to attend FIDM with my skills and passion. My life was going to be all glamor and fabric and notions and chartpak markers, full of lattes and black boots. Then it all went to hell - except for the black boots, I still have those. By 18, my dreams of fashion design weren’t dead but surely buried, awaiting resurrection.
But it was fashion design that laid the foundation for my marketing career. I always found it logical to think from the end-users’ perspective. Asking questions like “why would they use the thing you created? And how? For how long and when/how/why/should I give them something new?” felt normal to my design process. And this is the perspective that Sue Ellen brings to her situation that changes the course of her whole life when she has to grow up over one summer at 17.
And I tell you this because at the core of this story lies necessity. Necessity either makes us or breaks us. It is the water, sculpting tools, and hands by which we are molded and crafted into the final form the Creator intends for us before we are fired in the kiln of adversity. And like that clay, we either crack or we harden. It is necessity that leads her to her destiny at a failing fashion line in LA and it was necessity that led me to my destiny in AEC marketing. As we all say - no one planned to be here. Sue Ellen didn’t plan to be in the underbelly of the LA fashion world either but she didn’t let it get her down knowing the responsibility she carried for her and her siblings. She tells her co-worker of one day (and later love interest) -
“I am NOT working at the big top from hell for pocket money. My mother's out of town for a while and I've got my brothers and sister to feed. And nobody's going to hire a teenager to do anything that's not disgusting. Why can't I get a job at some nice clean office?”
What I also love about the character of Sue Ellen is that she doesn’t linger too long on the crap-hand she has been dealt. There is no rest for her wicked, there are mouths to feed and bills to pay, and she relies on her skills and tools along with her grit and gumption, to fake it until she makes it. I think the creativity that she has as a clothing designer also lends to her creative problem solving, she acts as though there is more than one solution to her varied situations, and when one is exhausted she has a few more waiting to be used. I can only surmise as much because I operate in the same manner - there are multiple solutions to people with a creative mindset and I recognize the same thought process in others. She rallies her siblings with leadership stemming from this mentality:
”All right. We don't need a warden, we don't need somebody telling us when to eat and sleep and vacuum. We can still have a great summer, we just have to work together.”
Another reality that she faces and learns about at a young age is the balance of burnout and reward. I have seen a lot of buzz recently about burnout but not enough about reward. After a couple of weeks at her job she quickly learns about the dreariness of the commute, the sting of taxes, the long hours, meals missed with family (one of my favorite scenes by the way and it only gets funnier as I get older) and other sacrifices that a working professional makes. When she says that her dream day off is being alone at the beach with a towel and a walkman (kids ask your parents about those) anyone working full time can feel and relate to her burnout. In another montage however, she’s doing okay at work, she finally learns how to fax a document (again kids, ask your parents), she’s bonding with her siblings, tucking them in at night, the house is clean and things are running smoothly. As someone who recently fell into that situation, I can tell you that the moment of peace you get when it all goes right is a scary and unnatural feeling. Because yes, I had been working non-stop since I was 17. But standing on the patio of a house that I bought, that my partner and I struggled to get to, with a huge backyard and fat happy cats, suddenly the reward felt so overwhelming and the burnout so diminished I felt like I was in a foreign and perfect land, and even writing about it gets me choked up. Bask in whatever reward you can muster, whether it’s an attempt at a bubble bath, a date night with your Clown-Dog delivery boyfriend, dinner on the patio with your partner or snuggling with your fat happy cats. It’s all for nothing if it’s not for something.
The biggest element in her success, besides her senses of duty and responsibility, is the support of her boss and mentor Rose Leslie. I didn’t think a relationship like that was possible until I met my real-life “Rose Leslie” , my first boss in the AEC business who gave me a chance, who showed me the door that I burst through. I will easily admit that most elements I write about are fiction but this one is absolutely real and possible, it’s just rare as hell in this business climate. If you find that mentor, teacher, sage, guide, or tutor - listen and learn as much as possible, no matter your age. Everyone needs an example and I think she was smart to listen and learn to Rose while working to pay the bills. At 17 it’s easier to step into that mentality but you should always be prepared to step into it at any age. I still love hearing Rose reassure Sue Ellen with easy-to-follow advice:
“Don't feel overwhelmed, just do one thing at a time.”
Look, I still fake it until I make it. I was recently referred to as a proposal expert - a title I still find uncomfortable and sometimes undeserved. I consider myself a creative first and foremost, and a lot like Sue Ellen - I have had to fake it until I made it. It’s all about biding time until I have a chance to unleash creative ideas that inspire and pave new paths. I fail at personal relationships, I give too much, I sometimes take on more than I can handle, and I still come back for the next challenge. There is a “manifest destiny” energy to faking it until you make it but the real key to its success is not faking it. In the film you see Sue Ellen taking notes, asking questions, asking for help, delegating, doing and asking for permission later, she is actually going through all of the steps of learning the job without unnecessary exposition. So by her example you are really just an “expert in training” as we all are. Keep asking, keep trying, keep creating, and keep your eye on the reward ahead, and you’ll be “right on top of that” too.
